Da Fook Just Happened In Game Of Thrones? S05E10

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….

……

Yup that’s how I feel right now. No words.

But you know what George R. R. Martin? I’m catching on to you. You’re not surprising me anymore. I see how you work your books.

But dammit they’re not following the books anymore!

That was me having a lame Shakespearean soliloquy.

Alright for any of you who haven’t watched the last episode of this season, there’s major spoiler alerts coming your way so if you don’t got the guts to see children burning alive, an entire ancient dynasty falling to their knees and seeing your beloved character stabbed countless times over and over again till his/her guts punctured torn and bleeding out on to the dirt then this article aint for you.

No sir. Not for you at all.

But if all that sounds nice and dandy then you’ve come to the right place.

Who should I start with?? Who!?

Jon Snow?

Stannis Baratheon?

That kinky bitch who got thrown off the edge by Theon Greyjoy (formerly known as Reek)?

Alright let me collect myself here.

Jon Snow

Yeah, that God dam handsome fella.

I regret supporting his decision to make Alliser Thorne the First Ranger. Somewhere deep inside I believed that a good heart would lead the Night’s Watch into victory and greatness. After all Jon Snow brought together the Wildlings and convinced them to step over the wall.

Former Lord Commander Jeor Mormont believed in him.

Former maester Aemon Targaryen believed in him.

Alliser Thorne, not so much. Apparently the support of two wise men of the Nights Watch is not enough to sway Alliser. Maybe he thinks of himself a genius of some sort. A savior of the realm.

Fool

But what happens now?

The White Walkers will take over that’s what. But not before Alliser makes enemies with the Free Folk that walked past the guarded wall.

Just a lot of mayhem.

By the way, Jon Snow gets stabbed to death in the middle of the night.

Let’s talk about the Red Witch (Melisandre) who promised Stannis Baratheon a King’s victory by burning his only child alive.

ALIVE.

You saw the scene where Stannis bumps her with his armored shoulder when she tried feeling up on him right? Is that why everything turned itself around? Not that I’m a believer of the Lord of Light.

But hell…she gave birth to a shadow demon.

In any case, so many characters died in this season. Now we wait another year before anything gets revealed to us.

What’s really left for us?

Most of our beloved characters are dying off. Tyrion is pretty much the only one left.

Oh Shit and what about ARYA??!??

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