Marriage is said to be sacred, as it is the intertwining of two souls to start a new family. It is described as one of the most heart-fluttering moments that anyone can feel in their life. It happens only once, so it is treasured deeply by those who experienced it. Also, marriage results in the formation of a new family by bearing children. We all know that children are a source of happiness and are the best gift to be given in a couple. However, not all marriages end in a good state. Problems and separation are possible, which affects not only the couple but most especially the children. Given that, we are going to discuss divorce and its effect to children. We are also going to discuss how children cope up with this kind of situation.
Divorce is a legal process of separation signed by the couple. This is only possible to happen when the couple got married. This may be a sad ending for a treasured marriage, but some factors can’t be controlled, it just happens. Divorce can be both good and bad. It is good for it can protect the couple from hurting each other, as well as their children, especially if there is physical, emotional, and mental abuse involved. It is bad in the sense that it affects mostly the children. Separation of parents is a hard thing, and it can affect the children mostly in their emotional and social aspects.
Effects of Divorce to the Children
To widen our understanding of how divorce affects the children, here is a brief list of it.
- Poor Performance in School
The very first effect of divorce to children is poor performance in school. Children with divorced parents are highly-affected that it decreases their interest in school and academic activities. They are losing hope and fun to study well, knowing that their parents are separated. Also, instead of studying and learning, children will be most likely to think deeply and might as well be emotional.
- Difficulty in Adapting to Changes
As a couple decided to separate and get divorced, there are upcoming changes that bring a huge impact mostly to the children. This is the difficulty experienced by the children when they are adapting to the changes. Since a couple is divorced, living together in one roof is not possible. One partner stays with the children while the other steps outside the house and the family. However, this does not mean that the other partner loses his or her responsibility to the children. Responsibilities in guiding and supporting the children, especially in their studies, are still done as a couple by divorced parents.
Moreover, children who used to see their parents living together will have a hard time seeing them separated. A family that was once happy and complete is now ruined and unhappy. These are only some examples of scenarios that make it hard for the children to adapt to the changes they have in life.
- Loss of Interest in Socializing
Another effect of divorce to the children is the loss of interest to make socialization or communication with other people, especially their fellow children. This is because of the emotional trauma and feeling of hopelessness. As a child, they mostly see that everyone in their surrounding is happy. Also, once they saw a couple or a complete family hanging out together, they feel envy. This triggers them to lock themselves and be alone. They lose interest in talking with other people. One example scenario for this is inside the classroom. Children with divorced parents do not like to talk in class, and it affects them not only socially but also academically.
- Emotionally Sensitive
The next effect is that divorce makes the children be emotionally sensitive. We cannot deny the fact that children are close to their parents, and seeing them separate is a hard thing. Sadness, anger, and other emotions mix inside their heart and mind, which makes them feel unstable and sensitive. This is a crucial effect that needs an urgent solution to prevent it from worsening, affecting the children even harder.
Anger is the most common emotion, or feeling children can felt that from seeing the divorce of their parents. Anger issues can easily get them, making them feel irritated, jealous, and envious of any good thing surrounding them. Anger also makes them feel cold-hearted and sensitive that affects the way they think, connect with other people, and act.
- Guilt Feeling
Another effect of divorce to children is guilt feeling. According to studies, children feel guilt whenever their parents ended up with divorce. They always blame themselves as the reason why divorce caught up with their parents. The guilt they feel will turn them into sad and unstable children that further affect them socially, mentally, and emotionally.
- Health Problems
Health problems are also considered as an effect of divorce to the children, especially if they already have a previous health condition. Divorce worsens their health condition, making it more severe. This is because divorce can trigger them to not care for themselves, hoping that their parents will come back together for their sake. Also, bad health habits can be their comfort zone while coping up with sadness and guilt that they feel upon the divorce of their parents.
Lastly, depression can be an effect of divorce. Children are the most affected in this scenario, which makes them feel sad, hopeless, and emotionally unstable, which brings them depression. We all know that this is a harmful disorder since it can trigger suicidal thoughts, psychopathy, and other else.
Children are said to be the wonders of any home. They are the source of joy and hope in every family. However, they are also the most affected victims of divorce. They suffer a lot, especially emotionally. Given that parents must be cautious, or if they can’t be avoided, they must educate their children about the situation. As much as any couple can, divorce must never be treated as a choice when relationship problems come. Children must be protected and provided with a happy family.